Meng sent me an email directly related to yesterday’s post.
hey,
I was doing house keeping.
guess what. I found the notes from psy, on the wingmen theory,here it is.. u might find it a good laugh. brings back old memory, when I was a young and crazy psyco-engineer 🙂
PSY1022 – Psychology B
this is a mission
Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to go out with your friends and meet new female acquaintances to add to your repertoire of potential “friends.”
Of course, by the end of the night, you are a few hundred dollars poorer, you’ve accelerated your own liver failure (from all the alcohol you drank), your lungs are a shade darker, and you still didn’t get to escort that beautiful woman back to her place (you didn’t even get her number). It’s another familiar failed Saturday night.
Maybe it’s time to reconsider your whole pickup strategy. If it hasn’t worked for you and your friends in the past, then it’s time to try a new strategy: The Player’s Strategy.
the wall
In general, most men fail to meet women for 2 reasons:
the first problem is that they travel in packs but go on the hunt solo. What do I mean by this? When it concerns meeting women, men tend to separate from the squadron to wander helplessly towards the female pack, only to hit a wall and be shot down and humiliated.
The second factor that adds to the squadron failure is the pathetic expectation that “if I stand around long enough, maybe something will happen.” Most men will sit or stand around all night holding a beer, and watch women dance without doing anything. At the end of the night, they’re disappointed because they did not meet any women.
Of course not. In order to meet women, you have to approach them and start a conversation. If you can’t talk because the music is too loud, then invite them to dance with you.
The only way to actually meet women in nightclubs is to follow the ways of jet fighter pilots. Men have to learn to fight in squadrons. By sticking together, we increase our chances of having a Successful Pickup Saturday Night (SPSN).
social group structure
Look into the eyes of a pilot. In his stare you will see, among other things, great intelligence. It is precisely this intelligence that makes the fighter a great pilot. When pilots fight, the members of the squad gather together. Survival depends on cooperation. Each member works to care for, defend and protect his fellow members.
This is the same attitude that men must adopt. By working together, we can accomplish a lot more than if we continue to hunt solitarily. In order to achieve these goals, there are specific roles that one must take on. When hunting, you have to prepare yourself according to 3 main roles: the Kamikaze Pilot, the Wing Commander and the Wingman.
the kamikaze pilot
The Kamikaze Pilot has a girlfriend, is engaged or is already married. His main duty is to initiate the “seek-and-attract” plan. Because he is already dating, he won’t care if he gets shot down. He will also convey more confidence, and women will be more attracted to him.
These people have nothing to lose. To them, flying kamikaze is “just talking.” The key here is having them save the “I have a wife/girlfriend” part for the end of the conversation.
the wing commander
The Wing Commander engages the primary target. Anyone can be a Wing Commander. In order to become one, you simply have to spot a woman that you are interested in and get the squadron ready for action.
the wingmen
The Wingmen serve as decoys; they take one for the team, engage the secondary target, and jump on the grenade and generally keep someone else occupied while the Wing Commander engages the primary target. The best suited wingmen are:
# Good-looking friends who don’t know they’re hot. But be careful, these are the wingmen that can accidentally blow you right out of the sky.
# Ugly friends are perfect for the mission. They are fun and cool but lost the lottery on looks.
However, it is better to have no wingmen at all than bad wingmen. The type of people that make bad wingmen are:
# The drunk guys — they will usually crash and burn, and nip your wings on their way down. Instead of backing you up, they’ll give all your naughty secrets away.
# The boring geeks — There is nothing worse than having to turn around and bail out your own wingmen.
the opposite sex
Attractive women seek out attractive female friends, but to make themselves feel even more attractive, there is always one member of the group that is not as hot. The hitch? The attractive members of the group require that if men approach them, they have to find a match for the least attractive friend as well. The following best describes the female targets:
# The Girl-goyle: The least attractive member of the female group. The target that the Kamikaze Pilot seeks out and destroys.
# The Primary Target: Usually the best-looking female of the group. She is the one whom the Wing Commander seeks to “engage” in combat.
# The Secondary Target: Known as “Bogeys,” but also known as the “friend that drove us here,” the “we have to get up early” girl, the “we have to leave now” girl, or finally, the “if you think you’re going home with her, you’re sadly mistaken” girl. These girls range in beauty from hot and sweet, to average looking. These Bogey Pilots are engaged by the Wingmen.
rules of engagement
As I mentioned before, the first thing you have to do is be aggressive. Don’t just stand around and wait for something to happen because it never will. As soon as you enter the dance club, you have to seek out your primary target. Once you’ve located her, it’s time to spring into action.
The first move you must make is to gather your squadron together. Because you located your woman first, you become the Wing Commander. The next step is for the Kamikaze Pilot to move in and start a conversation with the Girl-goyle of the group. The purpose of this step is to infiltrate and set up contact with the female group. If no Kamikaze Pilot is available, then one of the Wingmen has to act as the Kamikaze Pilot (chosen by drawing straws prior to entering the club).
Having the Kamikaze Pilot (single or married guy) talk to the least attractive girl serves 2 purposes; the first is to eliminate her by sacrificing himself to a conversation with her for the whole night (she does not know that he is married or dating). The second purpose of talking to the least attractive friend is so that the prettier friends won’t have to be so concerned with finding the Girl-goyle friend a match.
You see, most women avoid talking to men because they feel guilty about leaving their least good-looking friend by themselves — the Kamikaze Pilot takes care of that.
Once the Kamikaze Pilot is properly introduced to the female group, it is time for the Wing Commander to spring into action. His role is to walk by the Kamikaze Pilot and let the Kamikaze Pilot introduce him to the gang. The Kamikaze will first introduce the Wing Commander to the primary target, and then to the other friends. After greeting all of the friends, the Wing Commander shows his interest by talking back to the primary target.
The legendary Wingmen wait in the shadows of the club. They always appear on cue and rarely fail at their assigned duties. The Wingmen move once they observe that the secondary targets are showing signs of impatience, or even try to interrupt the Wing Commander. The Wingmen’s job is to keep the secondary targets distracted.
Sometimes, the Wingmen have to take more than one secondary target at a time. You can never predict how the mission will turn out. Sometimes the Wingmen do better than the Wing Commander. Sometimes, the Wing Commander gets shot down. Other times, your wingers get shot down and you have to abort the mission because you blew your cover.
There is one important code that is followed by all members of the squadron: If the Wing Commander panics and is too afraid to continue his mission, then the fastest Wingman takes over as the Wing Commander. This is done to keep the squadron alive by encouraging the Wing Commander to fulfill his duties.
enjoy the moment
The next time you go out with your friends, change things around and make things a little more fun. Instead of just standing around with a beer in your hands, play a game and make the whole experience fun. But remember: united we stand, divided we fall.
Brilliant! Simply brilliant!
Are these guys interested in running a comedy night by any chance?
Posted by Daniel
If I ever find myself being chatted up by a guy who turns out to be already attached while his friends talk to my other friends I’m going to be very upset!
Posted by Vera
Hm.. this is true for the most part. But i think most guy grounps do this in a less planned/orderly fashion, or even subconciously.
Yeah.. thinking about it, I’d say this is very believable. These guys have just brought to light the details and made it public, also making them look very desperate at the same time. hehe
Posted by Jason
Hello Joan,
A very interesting blog you got down here ïŠ.
That thing wingmen theory we were talking about was just the basic. Wait! There’s more to it. Let me explain:
During our operation young years, we have things like. Wingmen, Wing commander, AVACS, spies, double agents, mission control. And yes even your WINGWOMEN was an integral part of the operation.
Beside the standard wingmen, wing commander, kamikaze pilots, we have cool stuff like
“Translator†– cause some target girls of other origin, speaks a different languages. And when they convey their deepest feeling they naturally do so in their native language. So having a translator can get you some inside details that are not normally transmitted on the English Channel.
Yes, we even have your wingwomen – they are female friends assisting our wing commander.
Once we had a wingwomen PRETENDING to date another wingmen, so the “target girl†had an impression of a double date with the wing commander. That was another funny story, Yes Joan they did all the below:
-provide insights into the bizarre female mind
– act like a rival and make the target girl jealous/interested
– distract the accompanying girlfriends in a more natural way.
-networking with the target girl group in hope of recruiting double agents
-lure too: once, we got a wingwomen to ask the target girl out for coffee, Target girl agreed! Unknown to the target girl, the whole squad of was waiting in the coffee place to ambush her. So, when the wingwomen and target girl arrived, we’ll all go “hey, what a coincidentâ€. Then the wing commander would use a corny line like “hey, looks like this is a sign that we are meant to know each other better, we keep bumping to each other all the time…..†[its really nothing more than just a well executed plan]
-More (too much old memory to fit in this small space)
“AVACS- eye in the sky†Think it stands for something like advance reconnaissance blab la.. Can’t even remember why we named it like that. Basically it’s this person’s job to keep an eye the battlefield. Give a report at the end to access the performance of the squad. Once, there was this other bad bad guy who liked our “target girlâ€, our AVACS detected this and saves the day. But that’s another story, so eye in the sky is really important too
In engineering there’s only like 2% datable-girls in the class, the rest are either, too boyish, nuts, too dominating, and etc.. Hey, its electrical engineering it’s a male dominated place so the competition is very tough.
In the heat of the battle, missiles streaking everywhere, coordinating a squad to take out secondary targets (her friends) is not easy task, often the “Wing commander†is clouded by the FOG OF WAR [see glossary]. * During these times the wing commander can call on, [Mission Control] –These are elite committee advisors, usually the most experience in this field. Their main task is to advice wing commander & make sure he don’t crash. Think of it like Huston, – whenever an astronaut runs into problems “Huston We’ve got a problemâ€. I was usually elected to be one of mission control team, on the basis that I went to a Co-ed school, and I was studying psychology and I had the most experience with girls – AT that time. We do stuff like
– give WC pick up lines
-keep him FUNNY, CONFIDENT & Mysterious in the face of the “target girl†(our tactical plan)
– discuss future mission and past mission performance
– Do Battle plan, where we had everyone represented as toy cars, cause we only had toy cars. our symbols were:
Ferrari – target girls, or hot guys or hot girls
Toyota Camry – girls or guys, with conservative or family type personality
Bus – A guy who would PICK-UP any girls he sees. Usually a playboy or playgirl type personality
General sport car – wingmen or wingwomen in the mission
Damage or soiled toy car – to represent ugly but friends of the “Ferrariâ€
Truck or van – Fat person
toy plane – Avacs – eye in the sky person
merc or lexus – rich boy or girl.
Example: planning goes something like. “at 0800 hr the Ferrari, will be waiting in front of the lecture hall [move the car]…….in the lecturer hall will be seated as plan….. the Bus will initiate conversation…… when signal is given, the bus will pretend that he’ll need your help. And will re position himself here here and here..â€
We’ll move the toy cars like around like they way u see the movies when they are planning a battle.
-more… continue next time.
I am sleepy now.. let me know next time.. there’s just too much to tell.
Conclusion – overall. We had almost a 100% success rate. We manage to get all the “target girls†to come along to party with us to, bbq, shopping and etc {measure of success}. Weather they (wing commander and target girl) loving one another, that’s a different story, But its our job to give the Wing Commander the best possible chance. How often would you agree to go out with a group of strangers whom u don’t even know 2weeks ago?
When I came across the theory it in class, I was a bit skeptical, but when we tried it out. I was amazed that it worked! TEAM WORK works!
There’s more:
Double agent – a friend whom is already a friend of the target girl. But we got her to defect to our side.
Pathfinder – just point to the person you like, this pathfinder will find out their names, what course she does, what class she’s in and what time etc.
Spies – unknown to the “target girl friendsâ€. Has the ability to survey the site in advance without arousing suspicion, they must be kept secret, they cannot be recognized by her or her friends
Infiltrator- daring wing women, who risk herself and fly alone to enemy territory, to be friends with the “target group†and gain their trust.
Sniper – a wingmen, who has the ability to establish rapport, talk and get her friends away from the “target girl†at record time. 2 min is our current record time.
Propaganda mission: wing women who would fly in and spread news of, how wonderful the wingcomander is or how bad the competitor is.
Double date mission: wingwomen and wingmen pretending to date each other.
Ambush mission: lure the target to a killbox, where pretend it was all a coincident that we meet up.
Much much more.
Glossary: Fog of War – research has shown when you are in love – you do stupid things, during a mission when A guy got a hot’s for a girl, its easy for him to do stupid and crazy things. This stupidity = FOG
Posted by meng
Daniel, I can imagine all this in a very funny skit. It’d have to be carefully scripted and acted to make sure it didn’t become a caricature of a caricature but I think it could be done :p
Meng, you have a mind that thinks just above the ordinary level! Datable girls represent 2% of engineering? Let’s see. 15% (females) x 70%(non-tomboys or gay) x 40% (not attached) x 90% (not weird) = 3.8%. Well, it’s the right order of magnitude. It probably varies between eng disciplines, too. In Enviro Eng, the 15% females would up to 50%. In civil it’d probably be 35%. There’s the solution right there. Date a civil girl or a greenie!
You may have noticed that I deleted a few comments. They’re just repeated comments. I’m not censoring anyone.
Posted by joanium
Hey Joan, nah, my mind is pretty ordinary like everyone else. When many ordinary minds work collectively as one, we operate beyond boundaries. See, Its easy to look down on someone and say things like
“I don’t think they are a good matchâ€
“he’s too desperateâ€
“he should make the 1st move†– even though he’s never seen a girl in his life.
It was our challenge to achieve the impossible & break down those barriers. We help change ppl’s life for the better, we turn desperate, shy & geeky engineers into Casanova.
Quality control was very important. The squad only aims for top 2%. After every successful mission, we’ll take a group picture with the “target girlâ€. Then we’ll show it to our general friend and challenge them to find any one better looking than her. If they find more than 10 girls better looking than her (through voting), she’s dodgy. 35% wouldn’t cut it Joan, we wanted to reach for the “STARâ€
The squad started with only 3 ppl, but it grew and grew. During its peak, we needed 4 car load to just ferry our squad to a BBQ with the target friends. Massive logistics.
As most ppl DON’T go into exam without studying & take blind faith in hope that they’ll pass. It applies here too. Before all the glamorous “wingmen†mission all “WingCommaderâ€[both M & F], are put to a 3 weeks intensive training program. Turning a shy, scared-of-girls, from an all male-high-school into a trained Casanova, – full of confidence, funny & mysterious. We start by building their confidence up slowly step-by-step. I was the training coordinator & below are some of my recommended drills.
Stage 1 – [computer simulation] back in the late 1990’s MIRC was a popular chat program then. Trainee are made to chat to random female strangers, like “Hi, age/sex/location?†stranger-girls on the other side of the computer can’t break your heart.
Stage 2 – [soft practice target] trainee are taken to the mall. Walk into store with women working in there e.g. men’s clothing store. Doesn’t matter if the women are hot, fat, ugly or married, it’s just simply for practice. At first let the women start the conversation.
e.g.
girl: “may I help you?â€
Trainee: “yes, I am looking for…….bla bla
Repeat the above for the next 5 stores
Stage 3- [eye contact] – exactly the same except, trainee has to hold eye contact for more than 5 sec at the sales girl.
Stage 4 –[live fire] – enter a shop and ask the sales girl working there “Hi, I need a female opinion on something, which of this shirt looks better on me? this or this?
When she picks one, trainee shakes head and say “you do?…. Why do u like this one better?†“I wanna be a chick magnet, so tell me what you’re thinkingâ€
One of my favorites; to charm a Mcdonald’s chick to make your 50cent cone as tall as possible. The person with the tallest ice cone wins.
*note* places like Chadstone is great practice range. These women are paid to be nice to you. Most of the time they crack up laughing. But it’s a great way to build up confidence.
After all the training it was time for a mission:
Laser quest mission: once we invited the “target girl†and all her friends to a “laser quest gameâ€. We would all hunt down the poor little “target girl†with our laser, pinning her to a corner[planned moved]. Then out of nowhere, the “Wing Commander†would pop up and shoot us all down and save the little “target girl†emerging as a “HEROâ€. Target girl said “ [Wing Commander name] made me feel very PROTECTED†…..MISSION SUCCESS
Now coming to terms with it, this Wing Commander project was part of something special. I would do anything to be young again and re-live those moments again.
Sometimes, I’d wish we had written a book on it. Too bad of these knowledge is pretty much lost.
Posted by meng
You know, Meng, you could create an entire blog for your adventures. I’m sure you would get a following of readers. Maybe you could give advice to shy guys and gals!
Posted by joanium