We were a couple of drinks in at the pub last week * and a colleague I had met for the first time that evening was getting angry.
One of the things he was angry about was a girl in his group, who worked only exactly the hours required of us (9am to 5:30pm), and yet she is well thought of by most people.
‘People like her, they’re good at self-promotion and talking themselves up,’ he complained. ‘But she doesn’t put in the hours.’
I was surprised to hear this. I know of this girl and have chatted to her a few times. I haven’t worked with her so I don’t know how ‘good’ she is. However, she does have an interesting personal and academic background and she seems to have a lot of initiative.
I started thinking, ‘Maybe… maybe there are people in my company who are upset about me too.’
Compared to other junior people, I am well known around the company. I hope this is because I do good work. In addition, I do try to meet people, keep in touch, make presentations and answer questions on the online company forums.
While I’m good at raising my profile, I hope I back this up by showing I have something worthwhile to contribute.
I am sure that there are people in the company who have something equally worthwhile to contribute, yet they aren’t getting the same attention because they’re not as comfortable at networking and self-promotion.
I’m sorry if people like me crowd them out. I do try very hard to direct questions and work to the right people and this means passing on leads to those who know more about a subject than me.
Despite this, though, it is conceivable that there are people who resent me the way this work colleague resents that girl.
I can’t do much about this except I am now reminded that I must be genuine and thoughtful: to speak when I am sure that what I say could be useful (not simply grandstanding), and give the quieter ones in the group the space to contribute.
* Not me, I don’t often drink at pubs. I don’t like the taste of alcohol and friends/colleagues are happy for me to have water and chips instead of beer.
This is what I’ve noticed about my coworkers.
Some people simply work on the tasks they’ve been assigned, and while they might do so very competently, they don’t involve themselves in discussions on topics outside of their direct responsibilities. These kind of people might be with the company for years, possibly doing excellent work, but nevertheless remaining mostly unknown except to the people they directly work with.
Other people pay more attention to what’s going on outside of their own topics. They will attempt to contribute to discussions and help others with their problems whether or not it’s related to their own work. These people tend to become known as knowledge sharers and “organically” inherit more responsibilities rather than being arbitrarily assigned tasks.
When I started working, I definitely fit more into the first group. Over time I’ve tried to become more like the latter group which is challenging for a natural introvert like myself. This includes working outside of normal hours occasionally to communicate with people in other timezones. I think it really pays off, for example when I receive an email from someone half a world away I’ve never met starting with “I heard you were the guy to ask about (x)”, that’s quite satisfying.
To be honest it never really occurred to me that some people might be resentful of such behavior.
P.S. I hope you don’t mind that I use your comments section to write about my point of view.
Hi Rohan,
I’m very happy for you to write your point of view as a comment!
One of the most rewarding things at work, I think, is when people are deciding who should attend a meeting to think about something interesting and they pick you. This usually signals more work but it’s also a pat on the back. It’s nice to know that people value your opinion.
One of my friends once took me aside and said that because I jumped into conversations so readily, I prevented her from giving her ideas. That’s something for me to watch out for. It should be easy for me to slow down a little and minimise the risk of causing resentment.
However, there are probably people who can’t be pleased. They’ll see insult and conspiracy no matter how inclusive we try to be.
My take on this is that basically, everyone’s different.
You’re always going to find people that feel for whatever reason that they have to spend a long time in the office. Personally (perhaps because I am a bit older) I don’t get this. If people are doing a good job (ie doing what they need to and delivering appropriate quality to meet deadlines) then as a manager I couldn’t care whether they were even in the office at all.
You’re also always going to find people who think that other people have an easier time than them. Perhaps they should actually do something about it instead of just complaining.
I used to go home very promptly because my mum was waiting for me with dinner. I have no one waiting for me anymore so I regularly stay an hour or more late. The discipline of going home is hard.
I wonder what these people who feel hard done by could do? They’d might prefer everyone to work as long as they do, rather than they find a way to scale back their work. There was definitely a self-righteous tone to this person’s complaints.